Heyyy There!!!
Your world no longer has to be upside down. Every day that you wake up it is a new opportunity to make improvements.
Being honest with yourself will give you that direction to grow into what it is you are meant to be. Do yourself a favor and be the best possible version of yourself by improving how much you value you!
The secret to finding joy, permanent happiness, during inconvenient times is self-love. If you are genuinely happy with yourself, it makes getting through things a lot easier.
Life is going to happen. You may not be able to afford things. You might lose a relationship. Someone might be sick.
Life’s happenings have a way of sticking with you like a cold in the summertime. There are so many great things happening that your senses won’t allow you to enjoy because of this inconvenience.
Practicing Self-Love can be difficult. I get it; who wants to admit to themselves that they don’t see value in themselves. I know I didn’t.
However, it is during the vulnerable times that you discover what you value and begin to appreciate those values.
When we are young, we’re often asked what it is that we like to do or want to be. It is in the answers to those questions that people can get a piece of who we are.
Self-Love starts with spending alone time to figure out who you are. In the upcoming, you will find 10 different ways to help you learn a little more about yourself.
After reading this, if you find you want more inspiration in this journey to self-love, subscribe to this website.
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Before we go any further, let’s start with a basic definition
Self-Love — the practicing of action(s) that are genuine and beneficial to your emotional, physical, and mental well-being.
This guide is about acknowledging that this area in your life can be improved and exploring various activities that inspire you to become self-aware. It is through self-awareness that the journey to self-love begins.
Exercise #1: Write
Writing is a way to get the thoughts out of your head. Duh! But there is more to it than that. Sometimes we will not say things out loud for fear of it being “wrong” and therefore being judged for it.
You know, like I’m not supposed to want this or think that so if I deny it then it won’t be true.
That is so wrong, I’m sure you know that. Let me bring to your attention that the best thing about writing is you don’t have to worry about your notepad or computer judging you.
You will be surprised about what you learn from yourself by just ranting. I mean really go off in your writing.
Having a small journal whether it is electronic or physical allows you to be honest with yourself. The feeling of safety when writing is a nice way to start expressing yourself without outside judgments.
Exercise #2: Pray or Meditate
I grew up in a Christian home and prayer was basically beat into my head. Initially, I thought of prayer as a time to make wishes to a magical genie, well God.
As I’ve gotten older, I understand that prayer is a time to express myself and find peace through building a relationship with who I pray to, God.
Meditation is a similar concept as it is a time to clear your head and find peace. In one of my gym classes in high school, our gym teacher Ms. Brown would have us meditate and unwind sometimes. It was a great way to decompress and clear your head.
There is a ton of information about how to meditate or pray. Take the time to do your research and see which works best for you.
Download an app or Listen to a podcast. Trust me you have options.
Exercise #3: Workout
I learned back in high school that working out releases endorphins a chemical in your brain that leaves you feeling good about yourself.
The reasons that are stopping most people from getting that result is procrastination, excuses, and fear of pain.
Get over those things and start slow by taking a walk, maybe a job, or even join a gym if you’re feeling up to it. Once I complete a workout, I feel energized to do so many other things. Lots of people workout to start their day because it boosts productivity.
Not to mention, exercise has a ton of health benefits. Do yourself a favor and improve your physical and emotional well-being.
Exercise #4: Date Yourself
One of the first, and one of the only guys, I kind of dated during college taught me a lesson that did not leave my feelings hurt.
All jokes aside, I would complain to him about not having anyone to go to the movies with while he was away serving in the army.
One day he nonchalantly said, “Why don’t you go by yourself?”
I was speechless because it had never been an option that I considered. About a few months after that, I took his advice and went to the movies by myself. Initially, it felt a little weird, but once the movie started and I was enjoying the film uninterrupted it felt liberating.
The movies may be a great place to start with dating yourself if you are a bit anxious since you won’t have to worry about people “seeing” you. You can and should do anything that you enjoy. Most importantly, do not worry about people “seeing” you because you’ll ruin your fun.
Exercise #5: Give in to your desires
I reminded you earlier that life can suck sometimes. One way to help combat that is having a reward to look forward to. For 2020 I set one of my personal goals as treating myself 2x per month.
I have no idea what those things will be, but it’ll give me something to be excited about as I’m working my butt off to get great grades, work, and perform amazingly at my internship.
We all have a few things that we enjoy that we’re not really supposed to do because of whatever. I say occasionally do those things, within reason (don’t do drugs kids) and let yourself live.
Life is not about going through the motions but experiences.
Wild out on that chocolate, buy that cute thing you put back in the store, or treat yourself to that expensive seafood you keep sharing with your friends and family.
It is fine to indulge yourself occasionally. It’s when you indulge too much that you may start to get into trouble.
Exercise #6: List Your Great Qualities
Reminding yourself about how you have a big heart, are caring, loyal to a fault and whatever other amazing qualities you possess is a way to know who you are when you feel otherwise.
If you have a hard time doing that ask people you trust or who really care about to give a little assistance.
Tip: Be careful not to take the opinions of others as the only opinion that matters.
Exercise #7: Surround Yourself with People Who Care
The company that you keep shows you how much you value yourself. If you are trying to achieve goals, become fit physically and mentally.
It is best to surround yourself with people who have achieved those goals and will help or encourage you to achieve your own.
Being around people that care about you and your well-being allows you to feel safe, free to express yourself, and free to be YOU.
Exercise #8: Dance in The Mirror
Dancing is one of those things that almost no one pays attention to unless you’re like a professional dancer.
What I am trying to say is that when you are out dancing no one cares about how you’re dancing because they are busy dancing themselves.
It’s the people who sit out that may be judgmental. But that is because they are too scared to have fun.
Tip: If you’re still convinced try dancing in the mirror at home. It helps to eliminate that feeling that someone is judging. In the case of your home the only judging is you. Also, it encourages you to do better and makes you feel extremely good when you’re dancing looks good.
Exercise #9: Sing/Rap to Your Favorite Songs
Words are meant to send us messages. Everything has meaning, which is why I enjoy music so much. It is another form of storytelling from a perspective that I may have not thought of or possibly one that I can relate to.
Select songs that make you smile and feel like a beast.
Performing along to songs is a way to get an understanding of what you like or don’t. Do you like Pop, Country, maybe R&B? There is a genre and set of artists that speaks to everyone.
Exercise #10: Affirmations
When days come that your encouragement tank is empty. Repeating affirmations is a way to remind yourself of the truth you want to exist.
Below are some affirmations that I use for myself.
- I love myself
- I am doing my best
- My possibilities are endless
- I am proud of myself
- I am becoming more confident everyday
- I am free of worry and regret
Self-Love activities are about participating in things that will push you to loving yourself more and more each day. Each of the suggestions mentioned have one thing in common: each of them allows you to let go. Freedom through expression is the best way to become self-loving.
Xoxo,
Love Every Flaw
